At her fiftieth birthday party, Tess Thomason, a plain-Jane, divorced mother and decidedly unprepared women's newspaper columnist, is blindsided by her well-meaning family with a stack of gift cards she interprets as meaning she's fat, frumpy, and wrinkled. Facing a lonely future and failing career, Tess embarks on a journey of self-discovery, taking her readers along for the ride. But her resolve is nearly derailed by a hilarious season of family chaos that includes a surprise pregnancy, rushed wedding, and unexpected houseguests. In the midst of it all, Tess is drawn into a confusing new relationship with a man who is impossibly perfect for her. But, if she can keep herself, her family, and her willpower firmly seated on the crazy roller coaster of her life, maybe Tess will find her own self-worth and a new love in the bargain.