"It's not surprising that when I Google the word 'conflict,' the terms 'resolution,' 'mediation,' 'management,' and 'reduction' pop up. All of these words convey an important message about our association with conflict; that it needs to be managed, reduced, resolved and mediated.
The problem with conflict mediation, conflict management, and conflict reduction is that each one positions conflict as the culprit.
Whether intended or not, these labels and much of the methods used in the conflict and communication fields reinforce the misconception that if we can remove the conflict, things will be better.
When we mediate, manage, or reduce the conflict, we necessarily reduce the energy available for productive problem-solving. When we respect the tension and use that energy to create instead of destroy, the results can be transformative."